It Goes Both Ways, Always

In this particular scenario, I am referring to when we want to approach a guy and we do approach him and when a guy actually approaches us or might want to approach us or vice versa (if you’re a male). Like I had said in my previous post, I had just turned 21 a few months ago, so I haven’t been going out to bars and clubs that long; however, I have been in college for the past 3 1/2 years now so I’ve had my fair share of parties and kickbacks.

From what I’ve observed from my own experiences and from what I’ve observed from my surroundings, I’ve found it intriguing and funny that even though we want to be approached, we don’t really want to be approached. (Sounds weird and hypocritical of us right?) I mean we are only humans after all.

I think it just depends on what we’re looking for. When I go out, I want to meet new people (mainly men honestly), but I don’t want to meet just any type of man. I want to meet and converse with a man who attracts me. It makes me sound shallow as heck, but I want to meet someone who is “my type,” I guess you can say. You can call me shallow all you want, but in the end, we do all want to end up with someone who we have both a physical attraction to and mental and emotional connection to. Of course, we want someone who has personality, but all of us have a different “standard,” as to what type of personality we want in our significant other. If we all had the same “standards,” we would all be fighting with each other for the same person. However, life is not like that and we all are different people. We all like, dislike, hate, and love different things in life. That is what differentiates each of us from one another and makes all of us unique human beings.

Like I stated before, I just find it ironic and funny how we want others of the opposite sex to approach us, but we just become picky when they actually do approach us. I’ve had encounters where I just want to end up getting away from the guy. After though, when I reflect and think about it, I feel sort of bad because if I were them, I wouldn’t want the opposite sex to practically run away from me either, it would make me feel ugly and unconfident and I would feel like a total loser. If I approached a guy I was interested in, I wouldn’t want them to run away or make excuses to get away from me either. I can’t help it though if I’m not attracted to them and they don’t get the hint the first time that I am not interested. Once again, like I said it’s double standards and it’s hard to not feel the way that you do sometimes.

All I can say is that in the end, I honestly respect anyone who approaches anyone else of the other sex because it is a really hard thing for anyone to do no matter how confident you  may be and no matter how outgoing you are.

To flirt or to not flirt?

This is the second day I’ve been able to sit down and actually blog which makes me really happy and satisfied. Sorry to anyone and everyone who follows me, I have school, work, and a lot of other priorities in my life at the moment that I get swept up in, but I will try my best to blog at least once every month or so. Anyway, I’ve been in a more questioning mood lately and will be posting a lot of polls up like the one you will see in a moment to find out what people really think. You are welcome to comment as long as it is not something lewd or even email me to speak about your experience. I love to hear about other people’s stories and lives.

Anyways, cheers all! Happy thanksgiving. Stay safe everyone.

As I get older

I mean I’m not THAT old now haha. I only just turned 21 as of this year, but as I start to integrate more into adulthood and I guess reality, the “real world,” my thought process starts to change and I just start to think about things in different ways and in a different light. Sometimes I actually find it hard to relate and get along with people even though I have an outgoing and friendly personality. Sometimes I feel as though I’m the old grandma or mom who sort of looks down upon everyone else for their actions even though I used to do the things they do or I still do them. I don’t really look down on them though, it’s more of me observing them and their actions. It just gets me thinking, was I ever like that throughout my 21 years of life? I mean I know I did some of those things, but did I ever do the rest? If I did, then why am I acting like this now? I don’t think I’m above anyone at all for not doing the things they do. They just want to have fun and enjoy life, so why can’t I? Is it because I have to have a substance (alcohol) in me in order to be like that? I don’t want to be the college student who relies on it just to have fun. I just want to be my normal self to have fun. I believe in having fun no matter if you have anything or not. I just realized recently that I’ve moved on from a lot of things. Before I would enjoy just going to a normal, fun house party of some sort; now, I enjoy going out to bars more so and clubbing to have fun. Not only that, but I’m more into older men (not OLDER men, just within my age range all the way to 30 or so). I enjoy maturity more than immaturity, and I enjoy having conversations that don’t have to do too much with what major are you, what college do you go to, what do you enjoy doing on weekends, are you in organizations, etc. I’m just over all of those things. I enjoy deep, meaningful conversations with people who actually want to get to know me and who I want to get to know as well. Sometimes all it takes is a simple hi, how are you, what’s your name for you to be genuine. That’s sort of what I enjoy more so than before. Also, it really is hard for me to relate to others sometimes because when I ask them why they feel a certain way and they explain to me the reason, sometimes it seems very immature to me and it seems that there could be another option they could’ve taken, but I mean everyone’s different. Maybe it’s just telling me that I’m a different person and they’re not the type of people I’m really supposed to be hanging out with or talking to. Not only that, but now, I want to take care of my health and body more as well, mentally, physically, and emotionally. Before, I honestly was just throwing everything away, but now I know that it’s a lifestyle and I need to live out that lifestyle.

Bottom line is that I feel different. I mean in my opinion, every year,  one is supposed to change and feel a little different because you’re not supposed to end up the same as the year before, otherwise it wouldn’t be right. You could be the same and it could be fine, but life is a journey to find yourself. There will always be something you want to change, improve upon, etc, don’t stop there at your journey, continue it and see where you end up. Right now, I’m not too sure where I am, I’m in the process of change which is good. The change is scary, but what change isn’t? In the end, I’m more excited for it than anything.

Never Let Someone Control You

Recently, I have witnessed some ugly and repulsive events occur. The actions that occurred  should never have happened. They only happened because of the lack of trust in that relationship. If and When these actions do occur, they should be warning signals to you that something is not right in your relationship. With what I have seen happen, I will say to you that no one deserves to be treated that way. Everyone deserves the best possible person who will complement them, treat them well, and love them unconditionally. No one deserves to be in an abusive, controlling relationship, be it a man or a woman. It always goes both ways, yes it does. However, if someone starts to change for the worse because of their significant other, that relationship obviously isn’t meant to be. Now, I don’t mean to sound like a cynic, but even when the couple tires to work out their issues, sometimes it’s just too difficult and it isn’t meant to be. When you have a lot of your close friends telling you that they don’t like him, that should be telling you something. I know it’s hard to see past the good layer and see the bad layer, but you cannot be blind and naive. Even if you believe that there is good in everyone and only want to see the best in everyone, sometimes people can’t change for the better and there isn’t much to see beneath that layer.

Never allow anyone to change who you are as a person and never try to transform yourself into what an ideal image that someone else sees. Be free and be yourself. Never allow someone to control you and never allow them to tell you that you can’t do something, because you can as long as you are motivated enough and push yourself enough. Have dreams and follow them.

Note: These are my own thoughts and opinions said from own viewpoint. You may have your own beliefs and thoughts and opinions and I respect that, so please respect mine. I am merely typing what I observe and feel. I will not tolerate anyone who tries to slander me in any way. Comment if you please; however, I would enjoy hearing of your opinions 🙂